Interesting month, this past one, with life shaking and moving very unexpectedly at times... The Norway attacks, the sudden death of Amy Winehouse, the protests in Spain and the riots in London, to name but just a few ways in which life has shown up lately.

The best thing we can do, I find, at these times in which very unsettling events get reported more and more often, is to find our own center of calm and hold on to it for our own sake and to be able to support others.

And so I wish that you have been finding lately your own strength. Quite timely, I'm partnering with Aleks Srbinoski and opening a contest starting today, so that you can win one of the copies of his ebook "Instant Inner Calm" - this seems to come handy now. See below under the Positive Recommendation of the month for details of the contest!

On another note, I revised my handbook "From Conflict To Calm" and it is, as I type this, in the hands of my talented designer - by the way, if you ever need any designing done, I'd highly recommend you hire her - she does an extremely high quality job and it's inexpensive - contact me for her details.

Anyway, if you bought a copy of "From Conflict To Calm" I will be emailing you shortly offering you the updated version at no cost for you, so keep an eye on your inbox!

Until the next issue, keep calm, keep whole, keep well!

https://www.the-benefits-of-positive-thinking.com/from-conflict-to-calm.html

I shared with you last month that during my spiritual haircut I had several insights about my current situation in life, and promised to let you know about my testing those insights.

The insights were mostly telling me that I had already arrived at a stage of completion, in a certain sense. I felt as if I had been so busy building the road to walk on at every moment that I hadn't realized that I had already built a lot of road ahead. So I could take a rest from building and just walk ;-)

This has manifested in several areas of my life. For instance, my health: since I have been seeing Veronica, the Alexander practitioner, my back has changed dramatically. It feels different just to stand up! It feels more balanced, it feels fresh, new, and 'me'. So where I had been correcting my posture all the time, I can now relax into how my 'new' back feels :-)

The most road ahead that I've built, though, is in regards to my emotions and my sense of self in the world. I have found that I had been fighting hard to defend 'who I am' against what everybody else wanted me to be, and now suddenly I realize that there's no need to fight any more - I can simply be.

The reason I'm telling you all this is because you may also benefit from looking at where in your life you've being busy building so much road that you haven't noticed that you can just walk.

See, from childhood we're conditioned to behave in a certain way, to keep a certain attitude, to aim for certain things in life. Parents (with good intentions though), school, the media, religion - from all these areas come ideas of what's right and wrong, and what's appropriate or not for us.

But as you grow up you realize that fitting the standards of someone else (partner, parents, friends, work, society, church) does not feel good anymore. The sense of security and safety it gave you because you were doing the 'right' thing (behaving how they wanted you to) does not cut it - you're left empty and dissatisfied with yourself.

So the next natural stage is to fight back that image of you that others have built, and push for 'who you are'. This is the 'rebel' stage, if you like, where you try to affirm what you choose and defend it from the opinion of others.

And as you do some more internal searching, you notice that the only person that you need to fit the standards of is you. This is, *you* set the standards of your own life. You dictate that it's alright to get up late if you want to, or to choose that career, or to have kids, or to let go of it all and go live in a hut on the beach.

So instead of keeping building road to prove to others who you are, just get back to yourself, walk on the road, being who you choose to be at every moment, as much as possible. There is nothing to defend; there is only your choice in experiencing life at every step of the way, in the manner that you choose to.

May this find you in peace, and happily walking on your road ;-)

Every month I receive emails from readers - some of them contain questions or comments, and some of them are contributions, such as a positive story, an article or a tip.

This month someone shared anonymously the following piece of gratitude:

"I am so grateful that I was given the strength and courage to rebuild my life.

I lost everything after my relationship ended. Everything I had worked for was gone, but I'm so grateful I didn't let the evil get the better of me. I picked myself up and moved on and in less than a year I'm here, in a new city.

I am so grateful when I look around and see what I created from nothing but my sheer desire and will.

I have a lovely new house, amazing friends, a good job, supportive family, so what more could I want.

Life is good, God is good, and I feel truly thankful for having God in my Life.

I am sincerely grateful for everything I have, everything I have achieved and everything I will achieve in years to come."

Thank you! :-)

This week I've replaced the recommendation of the month with this announcement of a contest to win a copy of Aleks Srbinoski's ebook "Instant Inner Calm" (you can find out more about Aleks on his website Fulfilling Happiness).

Aleks is a trained clinical psychologist, and contributes to spreading positive attitudes and thoughts. His ebook "Instant Inner Calm" is a very easy-to-read guide with seven "secrets of success" - seven tools that you can use to create more calm in your life. It is very practical - it contains lots of information that you can put to work straight away.

To enter the contest to win a copy of "Instant Inner Calm", all you have to do is to reply to the question "What is the biggest challenge for you at the moment and what do you need to overcome it?" through the contact form on my web site.

The contest is open from today until 16 September. On the newsletter of 17 September I will announce the winners (only first name and country to maintain privacy) and I will also email them personally to let them know. Aleks is offering up to 20 copies of his ebook - so make your way to contact form to enter the contest to win a copy of "Instant Inner Calm"!

Best of luck!

I believe that being grateful for something is one of the most powerful tools to feel better immediately. Here are the two thanking bits of the month:

Thankful for... fresh air! I love it early in the mornings when the air is so fresh and clean, when it smells of Earth even here in the outskirts of London. That's a nice pay off for getting up early! ;-)

Thankful for... 'my' guitar. It's not strictly 'mine', it's my husband's, but he's fine with sharing it :-) Even though I'm not an expert guitar player, I can play a few songs and sing along - and I so enjoy it!

What are you thankful for? Share your gratitude on this page and read what others are thankful for!

Care to send me your thoughts about this issue's topics? Email me and let me know!

If you enjoyed this newsletter, please pass it along to your friends, family and colleagues, or send them to the Dare To Play It Big sign up page. I thank you in advance.

Stay well,

Cristina