As I look back to what my life has been so far, I am quite amazed at the way it has turned out. At the time of writing, November 2014, I can only say that you never know what happens next - and what happens next is always for my best ;)
But maybe I should start from the beginning.
I was born in the North of Spain. I was quite a bookish child, not very popular, and a bit odd. As I grew into my teens, as all teenagers I felt quite conscious of my body - and not particularly pretty. Besides, I wore a brace to correct my scoliosis, I had teeth braces, glasses, and a real problem with acne.
I was always quite a sensitive person too - I would feel emotions very intensely, and feel as though there was some sort of invisible thread running all the things in life. I had no words to describe what I felt, no further knowledge, and no one who could tell me more about it.
Looking at my life up to my early twenties, you could however say I had it easy - opportunities to study and travel, two parents and a brother, a nice flat and later a house to live in, friends, a dog, sufficient money not to struggle, no life-threatening illnesses, boyfriends... that's already more than what many people in this planet have.
And yet, despite having the perfect scenario to be fully happy, I was not.
I felt disconnected, alone, strange and non-belonging. It was always a feeling that haunted me, more than the actual reality of my life.
Therefore I could be spending a nice sunny afternoon in a park, with friends, and still feel extremely stressed and alone inside myself; or I could be in a holiday at the beach with my family, and still feel isolated. Something was always missing; the grass was always greener somewhere else.
Still, I was living life like any other average person of my age and background.
In my early twenties I moved to London. I got married to a man my age - and soon my life started to become a lot more challenging and interesting.
See, by the time I married I was very young and had a lot of hang-ups. I did not understand the things I felt or why I felt the way I did; I had not done any work on 'creating my own life' as I didn't even know that it was possible.
My husband, a very intelligent man, came as co-creator in my life - to have beautiful experiences with him, and also inadvertently to help me find my way through being a mirror to myself. It was in this way that I became more aware of my own hang-ups.
Shortly after I got married, I came across a thin, fun-to-read book that opened the door to a new way of experiencing life. The book was Joe Vitale's 'Life's missing instruction manual'. It was the first time I came across positive thinking and using one's thoughts to create one's reality.
I took notes from the book with curiosity and amazement. Many of the ideas made sense. Other ideas appeared silly or too good to be true, but I put the suggestions from the book into practice anyway, observing interesting results.
Very excited, I shared my findings with a good friend in Seville during a holiday in April 2006.
I had been playing around with some of Joe Vitale's ideas to 'manifest' a certain event during that holiday that involved external elements way beyond my control, and it had to do with the traditions and events that take place in Seville during Easter.
Oh boy, was I pleasantly surprised when the event actually happened, and much more magically than I had imagined!!
"Maybe all this positive thinking stuff does work", I started to contemplate.
On the years that followed, I immersed myself into the self-help path. I started to read every book on positive thinking and self development that I could get hold of, try every technique and tip, and explore a broad range of subjects like Zen, Taoism, meditation, yoga, Reiki, Bach flowers, the Alexander technique, or crystals - to name a few.
The events in my life concurrently helped me to put all this into practice - from challenges in my marriage to problems at work to getting into debt... It seemed that life was handing me exactly what I needed to actively create the scenarios that I wanted to experience instead - and so to use the tools that I was coming across.
I kept on reading about many other related topics, and explored the big question 'Who am I?'.
I came across inspiring authors like Louise Hay, Byron Katie, Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts, Martha Beck, and many others; I did mirror work and gratitude lists, I used affirmations, I did visualization, meditation...
At points I had absorbed so much varied knowledge that I would wake up confused, not knowing whether first thing I should go sit and be grateful, or convince myself "I" was the center of it all, or on the contrary forget about myself and focus on serving everybody else, or keep repeating an affirmation to attract wealth, or rather look at life in detachment, or immerse myself in my suffering so as to understand it and "live real".
Huh? Too much for a Tuesday, 6 o'clock in the morning!
Gradually, though, it all started to make sense.
In a nutshell, all the learning I did brought me to discover that I was much more than just my mind. I discovered that "the enemy had always been at home", meaning I had lived my life over-identified with my mind and believing my thoughts - actually, ALL of my thoughts. That alone had created a lot of my feeling bad - and had also created very difficult experiences.
How relieving it was to find out that my thoughts were not 'me' and that I did not have to believe all the thoughts that passed through my mind.
As a bonus, through all that self-learning I found something else. I found a way to fully be in the moment, to experience the essence of life itself - to reach a point of internal stillness from where all creation starts. From there, I could actually use my mind and my feelings to create life as I wanted to experience it.
At some point during the learning journey I came across Solo Build It! (SBI), which is a system to easily create a website and manage it, and also a tool to earn money through writing about something that you like. But I digress - follow the link to find out more about how I created this website.
By the way, English is not my first language, and I only really learned to speak it from my mid-twenties. So if you catch any mistakes or anything sounds awkward, now you know why ;) (I'd really appreciate if you let me know of any mistakes, so I can correct them!)
My life has turned around from where I was when I started with that little Joe Vitale's book. I no longer worry. I have created a beautiful relationship and a perfect job, as well as many other amazing things. I live every day anew, amazed at the way that life shows up, full of gratitude and appreciation for all the good things I have.
I also know that life does not stand still, so I am always creating, through my thoughts and my feelings, the next best thing that I want to experience. And at the same time, I feel at peace with whatever life brings, because I know I can deal with it.
What I offer you on this website is the condensed version of all that I have found that works if you want to really be the creator of your own life, cherry-picking what works and how to master certain aspects of life that I find essential to feel happy and at peace.
I no longer feel powerless and disconnected, but empowered with the knowledge that it all lies in myself. It is up to me. Love and connection with others, as well as peace and happiness, are always inside me and always available.
I hope that you enjoy my website and go away today having found something that really helped you at this time in your life. Please contact me if you have any questions or comments!
I'll leave you with a couple of key actions to start changing your life for the better: feel as okay as you can with whatever happens, and breath deeply and slowly. This might not make a lot of sense to you just now - but try it and see for yourself ;)
P.S. I wrote a little ebook called 'Yes To Life' that has tips and advice to change your life for the better. You can find more about it following this link or you can buy it for just $8 using the button below...